Thank God I’m alive. Thank God I live in a safe neighbourhood. Thank God I live in a cul-de-sac. Thank God I wake up at freaking 4 a.m. So, I wake up at 4 a.m., as usual, I think I should lie-in today but I don’t, I start walking downstairs for my daily two glasses of warm water with lemon – I’ve been doing that for years. After the first step down I realise something is not right; wait, is the front door open? Like wide open? What the hell? “Harry, our front door is open!” I shout, my heart already racing, flight or flee hormones already on overdrive. “What?” Harry jumps out of bed and we check the house. We know our most precious cargo, the baby, is safe because his cot is in our room. I switch the living room light on and we take stock. Wallet? Check. Keys to Mercedes 1? Check. Keys to Mercedes 2? Check. Computer? Laptop? Check and check. We check that there are no intruders in the house. There aren’t. I obviously tell Harry off for not checking the front door was closed properly before I proceed to drink my water. My heart is still racing. If this had been Malawi, we would have been done for. Indeed, even in England most thieves are opportunists, they see an open door, they go for it. I bet most rapists are opportunists too, the sick b*stards. Anyhow, as I’m sitting in my morning spot chomping on my Caesar salad I decide today is the day I’ll write the blog about why I wake up at 4 a.m. and when it started. ![]() Back in high school you could not have paid me enough to wake up before 6 a.m. I tried the whole wake up at 5 a.m. and go to a classroom to study fad that was going on back then and I couldn’t hack it. It wasn’t for me. I slept superbly well back then. Once I hit the pillow, I was gone until morning – no toilet visits. Things changed at some point in my mid-twenties. Once I get up to use the loo, at 4 a.m.–ish, I frequently just lie there and can’t go back to sleep. Sometimes I’m up at 4 even when I don’t need to visit the loo. The real turning point was when I was pregnant with Chester. When I woke up at 4 a.m. I was so solidly awake that I definitely wouldn’t be able to return to bed. I decided to just embrace it and work. By 8/9 a.m. I’d be tired enough to sleep again. I got so much done during my pregnancy that everyone on a business program I was going through kept asking, how do you do it? I got so many questions and remarks that I wrote this blog: Productivity - How To Do More In One Day Than Most People Do In A Week! Giving birth put paid to that productivity. My sleep cycle then became dictated by Chester and I forgot all about it. He started sleeping through the night at about 12 months but I remained perpetually exhausted because breastfeeding really saps the energy out of you. It wasn’t until two months after he quit breastfeeding that I realized I keep on waking up at 4 a.m. (again) regardless of what time I go to bed. You know what I’ve been doing each time I wake up? I peruse Facebook – only clicking away when I scroll past an interesting news headline. I didn’t feel good about it; not at all. As far as I’m concerned excessive news reading is not only a waste of time, it’s how people shy away from work nowadays. They convince themselves they’re keeping up with current affairs. Meh. Most of the news you read won’t affect your life in any way shape or form. It’s not productive at all. Most days I don’t pick up a newspaper or visit a news site but a cursory scroll down my Facebook page tells me everything I need to know about world events and most of my friends’ lives. BBC Radio 4 and LBC (the only non-Music radio stations I listen to in my car) simply flesh out what I already learnt on Facebook. I digress… One Sunday evening I made a decision to stop complaining about my “insomnia” and just wake up at 4 a.m. I needed to turn what seemed like a curse into a blessing. I now go to bed at 9 p.m. and I rise at 4 a.m. I also have a 30 to 45 minute nap in the afternoon. Once I’ve done it 3 or 4 times in a week it’s easier to have a lie-in without involuntarily waking up at that time. Don’t get me wrong: If I had a job that required me to be up at 4 a.m. I’d hate it. The only reason 4 a.m. feels so good is because it’s my choice to rise at that time and not someone else’s. It was awful when I had a regular job because I’d wake up at 4 a.m., toss and turn for two hours then my alarm clock would go off just as I was nodding off. I often went to work absolutely exhausted because of my weird circadian rhythm. It’s much easier to embrace when you have a flexible work pattern as I do now. Waking up well before everyone else gives me a sense of such peace and control. As it’s summer, as soon as I done drinking my warm water I walk up to our loft room, set the French doors wide open and let the world outside in: the air, the sounds and the breeze. I see the sun rise. I think. I write. I work. Mornings allow one proper “me time”. Before the kids rise and the whatsapps start coming through I get to do exactly what I want. I used to think 4 a.m. was a super weird time to wake up but when Grant Cardone said he does it too, it normalized it for me and today it may well have saved my life!
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Why exactly am I doing this? You ask yourself.
This question is almost inevitable if you make a big change in your life. Everything takes longer than you anticipated. Lots of things don’t turn out how you imagined they would. Some things simply fail after you’ve expended a lot of TIME, MONEY and EFFORT. If it’s a new job you want, the application forms take hours to complete, in many cases you don’t hear back and the interviews are gruelling. If it’s a business you’re starting you discover once you complete one thing there are a million more things to do. The to do list is, by nature, endless and it’s not straightforward like a job – there is no plan or set structure, everything seems like trial and error. What will you be feeling at this stage? Sometimes, disappointed, very disappointed. You’ll be questioning your decision to shake things up in your life. No one cares what I do anyway? You’ll think. If you’ve left work and started your own thing you’ll discover that your friends might not want to be your customers. You thought they’d be all out ready to buy what you’re selling. You thought they’d even help you sell by telling their friends about it. Nope. That’s not how it usually works. I made this discovery early in business and by the time I was starting my third business I didn’t even account for friends in the plan. What you will discover is that there is a whole world of different people out there interested in what you’re doing. You just need to go out and find them. They’re on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and whatever the social media tool of the day is. You’re doing this because if you died tomorrow you would definitely regret not having taken this path with your life. Chalk the setbacks and outright failures down as life lessons. Someone, potentially a lot of people, do care about what you are doing. Don’t try to do it all on your own. Seek advice. Seek coaches. Seek mentors. Think. Breathe. Go! Make it happen. Have a business or life question you want me to answer? Please email it to me with the subject “Question”. Note that all such questions will be answered as a blog post and will be sent to my full email list. Related blogs: ![]() So, you felt uncertain about your next path and all your options seemed so unfamiliar to you. You did some soul searching. You did some research. You made a decision. You’ll probably now feel a little uncomfortable, a little uneasy. It’s natural. It’s not just you; even presidents and army generals get that feeling. Is it really the best decision for your overall wellbeing? Is it best for your family? Is it the easy option? I hope not. What if it doesn’t work? If it’s a business, most first businesses don’t work, you’ll go on to start another business having learnt a bucket load of useful lessons and hopefully made great contacts. If it’s a career change, what’s the worst that could happen? You could always go back to your old career. Nothing has to be permanent. ![]() The more you think, “this is a big deal”, the more anxious you will be about it. In several successful business case studies I’ve read, entrepreneurs revealed that a healthy dose of naivety helped them moved forward. If they’d known how much work, effort and complete endurance would be needed they would not have taken that first step. I agree. The beauty of phase one, being uncertain and unfamiliar, is that all you have to do is think. Now you’ve decided it’s time to do. Some moments will be painful. Failed meetings and interviews will make you feel like giving up. The learning curve will be steep. Having chosen an option you’ll now have a plethora of other decisions to make. In all of it remember that speed, comfort and instant gratification are the antithesis to progress. Keep working. Every effort you make moves you a little closer to the goal. Your efforts shut up that naughty little voice that says, "just give up". Whatever decision you’d taken would have involved discomfort and pain. Mistakes are inevitable; they are part of the journey. Yes, you can do this. Don’t listen to that little voice in your head that says that you can’t. Have a business or life question you want me to answer? Please email it to me with the subject “Question”. Note that all such questions will be answered as a blog post and will be sent to my full email list. I will only answer questions that I feel competent to answer and that align with the goals of this website. 1. How To Overcome "Uncertainty" and "Unfamiliarity" When Making A Big Life or Business Change18/7/2016 ![]() Over the last six months I’ve been in super chill mode. I’ve done very little, workwise, because ultimately I just didn’t feel like it. For me, that’s always a sign that something isn’t quite right. I’ve always enjoyed being active. I don’t fail to recognise that most people can’t just do that and still lead the same life; it’s one of the great benefits of running a mostly automated business. Anyhow, during these few months I’ve had the privilege of coaching people that approached me directly. I don’t like to say no to a direct approach. I’ve learnt more about the feelings and emotions that we all go through when we want to take a different path be it starting a business or making a career change. EMOTION 1: UNFAMILIARITY AND UNCERTAINTY What are you doing? Are you crazy? The status quo pays the bills, it keeps everyone at peace, why would you want to change that? Because you don’t feel completely fulfilled. You know you need to be doing something else but you’re not sure what. You have a few ideas of what you think you would enjoy but you’re not sure which one is the best one for you. You’re uncertain. Write a list. Include everything you think you want to do even the crazy stuff. Look at the list. Meditate on the list. Tuck it away. Take a couple of days out. You don’t have to think about the list at all, your subconscious will take care of that. Two days later, pull the list out again. Think through the pros and cons of each prospective path. Remove the ones you think you won’t really enjoy. Narrow the list down to two things, if that’s possible. Will your partner support your decision? Pass it by them. A good partner will help you list the pros and cons; they won’t discourage you. Toss a coin to help you decide not so that the side the coin lands on will set the decision for you but once that coin is twisting up in the air you’ll know which side you’re hoping for (Rothstein). Will your "new thing" pay the bills? Don’t worry too much about that for now. Why don’t you dabble at it to figure out whether it is indeed the best option for you. Do some research. Talk to people in the know. You may still be uncertain but you’re now more familiar; make a decision – go with your gut. Next you need to figure out How To Combat “Discomfort” and “Pain” After Making A Big Life or Business Change. Have a business or life question you want me to answer? Please email it to me with the subject “Question”. Note that all such questions will be answered as a blog post and will be sent to my full email list. I will only answer questions that I feel competent to answer and that align with the goals of this website. |
Heather on WealthI enjoy helping people think through their personal finances and blog about that here. Join my personal finance community at The Money Spot™. Categories
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