You know, I really didn't get it.
When people said 'My confidence grew when I lost weight' or 'I was finally able to walk with my chin held high, blah blah blah'. I thought puh-lease, get perspective. If a few extra pounds are your primary concern in life, thank your lucky stars. Some people have very real problems to think about out there.
Whilst I have never been the shy retiring type, I can honestly admit that I now feel even more confident having lost some weight. Not in the sense that I am now able to walk outside after many years of hiding my fat self behind closed doors but in the sense that if cosmo offered me a pose-naked photo opp, I would at the current time say "hell yes"!!
That's major for me.
So what about being slimmer makes me happier and more confident:
1. The belly jive
Ever run down the stairs and suddenly realised that your belly seems to have a life of its own: it seems to be jigging about independently with each step. If not, ever run for the train and had the same experience? I have. My belly has a little way to go but it certainly no longer moves of its own accord.
2. The belly rest
Ever sat down and noticed that your belly is taking a rest on your lap? Seriously, even at size 14 I was having this experience. I sat down and my belly rested in my lap. I didn't like that feeling at all and I am proud to say this is no longer the case.
3. Clothes shopping
It's great to go and fit into a normal-shaped dress in a shop. A little story. A friend of mine is in charge of uniforms at a school. A new worker came in and said she was a size 18. My friend got the 18 but it didn't fit. So she got the 20 and it too did not fit. She got their largest size, a 22 and golly-freaking-gee, it also didn't fit. They had to get that lady a custom dress.
Who would feel good in this situation?
Denial is not a river in Egypt and this is what many people actually do. They are in denial. When I was fat, if I loved a dress but I fit into the size 14, I left it in the shop. Why? Because I was not a 14 and I didn't want that size of dress in my wardrobe. Lots of women do this. I don't know why I did it, I guess buying the dress would be an admission of sorts, an acknowledgement that I was no longer a size 8 or at least 10. I was a size 8 at the age of 19 before I started gaining weight for the first time.
4. Feeling fit
My body shape looks good in the mirror. Call me narcisstic but I do now, regularly stop and look at myself in the mirror.
I now accept that the body is not an object of shame. It is a creation of beauty and should be carried with pride. I don't have to wear a jacket to hide my muffin top because I no longer have one. My arms look fabulous and my waist has definitely come a long way. I feel proud.
Is there anything else that I need to work on?
When you're overweight, you don't generally think about whether or not you're fit and strong. However, now that I'm almost there in terms of weight loss my attention has turned to my lack of upper body strength and my weak core muscles.
When I was a kid, I could swing on the bars at my school's car park. It was easy. I tried that a couple of months ago and I couldn't swing at all. I put one hand on a bar and I couldn't carry my own weight to grab onto the next bar! Shame on me.
Strength is a lot harder to achieve than thinness. You can starve yourself thin but you actually have to work hard to get your strength up. Sit-ups, push ups, weights, yoga - whatever. When I can do 15 successive leg-drops. I will let you know.
Anyone who has struggled to lose weight through careful eating and exercise will inevitably become a fat-snob.
If you think thin people are snobbish about their weight try slim people that used to be fat.
I have former fat friends who have admitted it to me. We all acknowledge that we were lazy when we were fat. We didn't want to make the effort to eat better and we desired scheduled exercise even less.
It's only when you're on the road to sexiness that you can reveal these truths. When we were fat, we were shamelessly fat but deep down it gnawed at us.
For me, exercise is not fun and it never will be but I feel great when I've done it. The pain of exercise inevitably makes one view those that are fat as lazy. The bottom line is: eating consciously and making time for physical exercise is exhausting; it is hard work. I was too lazy to make the extra effort to get fit and healthy at first and that is how I know that fat people are lazy: I used to be one. I am still lazy deep down but I am working at it.
My excuse was usually my job or my polycystic ovaries. It took real mental effort to admit that, "You know what Heather: a) You eat too much cake, b) You eat too much bread, c) Your portions are out of control, d) You never exercise and you need to do something about that!" Good luck to anyone who tried to point out any one of these things to me: Heather on the defensive is not a pretty sight.
I and my former fat friends are certainly not pro-skinny: all we want is to be fit, maintain a regular exercise routine and fit into the slinky clothes in shops.
Although your personal finances and your business success are my primary interest, I believe you only operate at peak efficiency when you're fit and healthy. If you feel good, it filters through to your work. To help you with that, click for your free ebook: The Quick Guide to Sexy